A few weeks ago, I was attending a wedding where Ive known the groom for about 20 years.
Where is it published?
You get the idea.
Upon realizing I was a personal finance writer, one of them grinned and asked me the million-dollar question.
Hey, got any money advice for newlyweds?
The question stuck in my head, though.
What money advice would I give to newlyweds?
Here are 10 pieces of very valuable money advice for newly married couples.
This post originally appeared onThe Simple Dollar.
Never, ever, ever, ever hide a single dollar of spending from each other.
If you have a hidden credit card, youre making a giant mistake.
Its never, ever worth it unless youre intentionally on the way out of the marriage.
What it does mean is that you need some sort of clear limit on your individual spending.
If youre going beyond that limit, then a conversation needs to happen.
It might not be an easy process.
You might not even know for sure what goals are most important to you.
Thats also going to be part of the conversation.
What about ten years or twenty years?
What about in your old age?
Then, look for areas where your visions overlap.
Those, right there, should be your goals.
Make those goals central for both of you, then develop a plan for making those goals happen.
Remember, though, this isnt a one time thing.
Your goals and priorities will change, both individually and mutually.
Revisit this conversation regularly and check that that you continue to be focused on your shared goals.
#3: Your Spouse Is Going to Really Tick You off Sometimes.
Forgive Him or Her
Its going to happen.
Youre going to disagree.
Its even easier to get lost in those flaws and to become negatively obsessed with them.
You get stuck on some little flaw and it grows and festers and becomes overwhelming.
Maybe your husband leaves his clothes out on the floor in the bedroom.
Maybe your wife has a bit of a bossy streak.
Maybe your husband dotes more on his daughter and is more strict with his son.
Maybe your wife likes to watch endless reruns of her favorite television show seemingly all of the time.
Dont get obsessed with the flaw.
Instead, think about the abundance of things that your spouse does well.
Focus on all of those things that you love, then find it within yourself to forgive the flaws.
If your husband leaves out his clothes, just toss them in the basket for him.
If your wife likes watching reruns, read a book instead while cuddling up next to her.
Find a way to live around them.
Focus on the positive traits instead.
Youll be far better off.
#4: Youre Going to Get Old.
So, think about what you want from your retired life and talk about it with your partner.
Then, start saving.
One (or both) of you may not even have a retirement plan at work.
Dont fall into that trap.
You might get some of that money in a divorce, but theres no point in risking that.
Your best approach is for each of you to have a retirement account.
Each one of you should jump into a retirement account on your own.
If you have a plan at your workplace that offers matching funds, use that plan.
Otherwise,open up a Roth IRAfor yourself and start saving.
#6: There Will Come a Time Where You Will Likely Support Your Spouse.
Thankfully, the site took off so that didnt happen.
I paid for our health care with my income and we just lived pretty lean for a while.
Sometimes your partner will go through a challenging employment patch.
Maybe your partner will want to go back to school.
Its going to happen.
Dont be frustrated by it.
Because they will occur.
#7: Start an Emergency Fund.
Youll Never Regret It
First of all, what exactly is an emergency fund?
Its simply cash put aside, usuallyin a savings account, for life emergencies.
Why not use a credit card?
The biggest reason is thatmany emergencies make a credit card no longer useful.
A bank cancelling your card or reducing your credit limit.
Those things can be real emergencies and a credit card wont help you.
Cash will get you through.
So, start building one.
That keeps you from tapping it in a moment of temptation.
The account will slowly grow over time.
Just leave it alone.
Use it only when you need it.
With an emergency fund, an unexpected problem wont turn into a crisis.
It wont turn into a fight.
Instead, you have the money to deal with it and life will go on.
The problem is that the dream isexpensive.
The bigger the house, the bigger the bills.
It means a bigger mortgage.
It means bigger utility bills.
It means more insurance.
It means higher property taxes.
It means higher maintenance costs.
The rest end up being used for storage or set aside for guests.
Its more space tofill up with stuff,and stuff is expensive.
Instead of dreaming about and shopping for a huge house, go small.
Youll find it much easier to be able to afford to do what you want in life.
A shiny new car is expensive.
It means a higher car payment.
It means higher insurance, too.
Those bills really add up.
(I trustConsumer Reportswhen it comes to identifying reliable manufacturers and look at Toyotas and Hondas first.)
Get on that cycle and youll never have a car loan again.
Youll also have reasonable insurance bills to boot.
The reality is that half of all American marriages end in divorce.
Thats a painful statistic, but its reality.
Another reality:Divorce is expensive.
How do you work on your marriage?
Do active things together.
Talk to each other often.
Sarah and I make it a point to have at least a few healthy conversations each and every day.
We talk about goals.
We talk about the state of the world.
We talk about the things in the world that are on each of our minds.
We also do a lot of things together.
We play board games.
We go for walks.
We exercise a little.
We work on projects around the house.
One of our favorite things to do together is housecleaning.
Set aside time for it if you oughta, which may be necessary if you have children.
Doing things together can become the glue of your marriage.
Final Thoughts
A marriage can be a wonderful thing.
However, a marriage isnt an automatic thing.
Its not always going to be easy, and money is often one of the biggest challenges in marriage.
ImageArtisticco(Shutterstock).
