These kids struggle to the point that it interferes with getting through the day at home or at school.

The label pathological, referring to the regular disruption of daily functioning, can be stigmatizing.

PDA research began about 20 years ago, and experts are still not sure why some people experience it.

Explanations include:

Children with PDA may not recognize the social power structure of adults over children.

Its sparked by a difference in social learning, not defiance.

Children with autism may not be motivated by social expectations in the same way that neurotypical kids are.

It may be connected to anxiety, trauma, or other psychological issues.

They can appear sociable on the surface but may have inappropriate social responses.

They show extreme mood swings and impulsivity.

They are comfortable with pretend play and role playing.

They sometimes had an early speech delay that they made up for in early childhood.

They can show obsessive behavior, particularly with a person.

They may have epilepsy or neurological symptoms like clumsiness and delayed gross motor skills.

Avoidant behaviors may escalate to meltdowns, aggression, running away from you, or panic attacks.

Anxiety management:Keep in mind the challenges your child has with anxiety, sensory input, and socializing.

Reduce uncertainty and keep arousal low.

Support their distress like you would a panic attack.

Negotiation and collaboration:Invite your childs input on how to get a task done, and stay calm.

Disguise and manage demands:Rephrase so it doesnt sound like you are demanding.

(Talking about expectations might trigger anxiety and increase avoidance.)

Complete the task together.

Adaptation:Use humor, distraction, and pretend play to make a task more novel or fun.

Allow extra time so the clock doesnt add pressure, and have a Plan B.

For example, they may practice spelling words if it earns their favorite stuffy points for an adventure afterward.

Finally, adapt what you consider a win.

You may need to break small tasks into even smaller steps, and celebrate any progress.

The PDA Society has compiled an extensivelist of tipsfor helping children with PDA.