How do you figure out your weak spots and then address them?
This post originally appeared on theHelp Scout blog.
Youd think leaders especially would be skilled atidentifying and removing obstacles.
In many cases, thats wrongheaded.
Our shortcomings do hold us back, but it doesnt have to be that way.
Perhaps youre unaware of how consistently negative you are in meetings.
Maybe you make excuses rather than accept responsibility.
Do you value being right over being effective?
Claim credit you dont deserve?
Behave as if the rules dont apply to you?
If you think, Sure, but thats just who I amthats a derailer too.
What tricky little justification machines our brains are!
Typically that doesnt lend itself to asking for advice.
She didnt want to say.
How can I change for the better if I dont know what Im doing wrong?
Some conversations are better off not taking place, she told me.
People dont want to be the bearer of negative feedback because they fear negative consequences.
We expect them to take it personally and get defensive.
They probably wont tell you, and (lets be real) youd probably get defensive if they did.
Instead, take these actions to solicit honest, actionable feedback about what you could be doing better.
Ask Questions
Lew advises a genuinely curious mindset about your own areas for potential improvement.
Asking a teammate What weaknesses am I oblivious to?
Frame Feedback as Advice
Its always scary to call it feedback, Lew says.
or Do you have advice about how to prepare for our client meetings?
This technique works because people love giving advice.
Everyone likes to think of themselves as an expert and to share their perspective, says Lew.
Just listen without interrupting, Goldsmith advises.
Dont finish the other persons sentences or let your attention wander elsewhere.
The only thing youre allowed to say is thank you.
Write It Down
One technique for listening without judgement is to write down the advice youre receiving.
(Otherwise, good luck ever getting honest feedback again.)
Share your plans for change with those around you so they can help hold you accountable.
It really took me aback, Atkins says.
Without follow-through, none of this matters.
Find out what they are, and then commit to a process for change.
Learn howHelp Scouttakes the headache out of email support.
Top image byJorgan Mcleman(Shutterstock).
