Im a 70s baby, and the badge of my people is our incredibly strong feelings for fondue.
And, you know, talking cars and Care Bears and an unwilling affection forthe Bee Gees.
But fondue endures in a way K.I.T.T.
Fondue is, in any form, kind of terrible for you.
Skip the TJs fondue kit.
Buck up and make some real damn fondue.
I recommend skipping fondue pots that use Sterno as their sole heat source.
They simply dont get hot enough to keep cheese melty.
You want anelectric fondue pot.
Pots and forks are inexpensive enough that its not worth a visit to the thrift store.
You want one with the nonstick coating intact.
What cheese to use for fondue
When it comes to cheese, I am a purist.
How you split that up is your call.
I make these decisions on the fly in the TJs cheese aisle, based on what they have.
I aim for around half a pound of cheese per person, which is both terrifying and dead-on accurate.
Take the cheese home, and grab your grater.
The additions
Grate some garlic.
Dont mince or slice; grate it with a microplane: Its fast and makes a nice paste.
Grab a whole bottle of white wine.
Leave the fondue pot on the table.
Were going to prep the fondue on the stove in a separate pot.
Add the garlic paste and two cups of wine, turn the heat to medium-high, and whisk.
Once the wine is just below a boil, start slowly adding cheese, a handful at a time.
Whisk as you go, fully incorporating each addition of cheese.
Once that cheese has melted, add another handful.
Continue doing this until youve added all the cheese.
Keep stirring until everything is completely melted.
Often, people are intimidated by the idea of melting all that cheese, or have failed before.
Now were going to adjust the viscosity of the mix and add the final flavoring.
You adjust it with wine, and people often add too little.
You want the consistency of a really thick pasta sauce, but no gloopier than that.
When in doubt, a little wine will help.
Lastly, a classic fondue has a hit of Kirsch, a cherry-flavored brandy.
I skipped it, and everyone was still quite happy.
I once added a little maraschino cherry juice, and it was delightful.
But a few years ago I began making this ridiculous concoction calledCherry Bounce.
I now add a hefty swig of that to fondue, and its been a miraculous addition.
You only need a splash.
Shred the cheese and toss with the flour.
Grate the garlic with a microplane, then add it to a pot, along with the wine.
Turn the heat to medium-high, and whisk.
Once that cheese has melted, add another handful.
Repeat until youve added all the cheese, stirring continuously until the cheese is completely melted.
Set up your fondue pot as described below and serve.
Choose one hearty, crusty bread and cube it.
Grab some soft pretzels.
Add steamed broccoli spears, cauliflower spears, and really well-roasted baby Yukon gold potatoes to the platter.
For a real bump, add some sliced Alsatian or German sausage, already cooked and warm.
Set the fondue pot to medium.
Pour the cheese into the pot and assign the person nearest the dial the job of Knob Adjuster.
Theyll need to keep the cheese below a bubbling boil.
(No cheese burns here.)
Keep the cord safely secured.
Everyone gets a plate, a fork and at least one napkin.
You shouldnt need a knife if everything was prepped to be bite-sized.
Playingsome Bee Geeswouldnt be absurd.
