In high school, our hockey coach was a demigod.
Hockey at the school was so important it nearly transcended the concept of sports.
Our coach was a natural teacher and dexterously wove in life lessons into nearly every hockey lesson.
And there were a lot of hockey lessons.
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Skating backwards quickly while covering lateral ground is a very difficult thing skill to execute even for top players.
Eager to impress, we all did the drill as best we couldbut carefully.
We did it wrong because we tried to do itperfectly.
No one survived the next round unscathed.
As we did the drill each week, we could all see and feel ourselves improving and getting better.
We kept falling, but we got faster and covered more ground.
The failure we had feared was not impressing our coach, where the true failure was not improving.
The fear of failure is a very real defense and reaction by your mind.
The reaction serves, for the most part, to take a stab at protect you from perceived threats.
The key word here is perceived threats.
This part of our brain developed to protect us from the very real physical threats like predators.
What defines your comfort zone inherently sets the boundaries that trigger this system.
This system served us well in an evolutionary sense when our comfort zone was the safety of our tribe.
The risky, unfamiliar, and unknown represented very real threats to our safety.
Now, the risk isnt physical safety, but emotional safety and security.
But when we were encouraged to fail, we stretched our boundaries.
Failure became the goal.
And we fell until we improved, until we started to see that we could exceed our perceived boundaries.
Heres where you’re able to start to overcome your fear of failure.
Reframe Failure
What is failure?
The only true failure is the one you dont learn from.
Facebook knows the biggest failure would be not evolving and not pushing boundaries.
If Facebook isnt evolving, building, and taking risks, then theyre slowly dying.
In sales, theres the aphorism, every no is one step closer to a yes.
Failure often isnt what you think it is.
So embrace hearing the nos and just keep trying during your drills.
The nos will come, and so will the yess, and youll move forward incrementally and inexorably.
Understand Your Fear
What is it exactly that you fear?
We dont all fear new things, taking risks, changing, and growing for the same reasons.
But really, whats the worst that can happen?
If we go out and start a business, we imagine that well lose everything if we fail.
Would you also lose your friends and loved ones?
Would you not have your family?
Would you lose the gumption and drive that compelled you to start a business in the first place?
Personally, after setting out to start my own business, I lost everything in the 2008 financial crisis.
The truth is that nothing close to your worst case scenario will ever be realized.
The right things will happen, the right circumstances and opportunities will present themselves.
Look at a picture of Mt.
Everest from base camp.
Its magnificent and imposing, and doesnt look the least bit climbable.
Add to that, the summit is racked by storms, -50 degree weather, and is utterly inhospitable.
Yet hundreds of climbers summit every year.
And they all start the climb the same way, with a single step toward the summit.
Its sounds like cliche, but action becomes a habit.
Its impossible for any human not to fear these waves.
Ever wonder why triathlons, mud runs, and marathons are so popular?
People want to push their boundaries and see what theyre capable of.
You build will power and drive.
Fear being in the exact same place next year as you are today.
Its challenging yourself and putting yourself in places where you encounter fear and facing that fear.
Its a part of all of us.
No one is truly fearless; theyve just learned to embrace fear.
How can I overcome the fear of failure?originally appeared onQuora.
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This answer has been edited for clarity and brevity.
