When you really want something done, you sometimes have to sway others.
And after all, a little nudge (in the right direction) never hurt anyone.
But theres a fine line between being persuasive and making threats.
The move drew a lot of outrage, and some even accused the White House of extortion.
Now, whether Zinke actually meant to be threatening or not, thats how it came across.
So how can you be a more persuasive person in your daily life?
First, focus on reciprocity.
In the bookInfluence: The Psychology of Persuasion,Dr.
Robert Cialdini explains that when someone receives something from you, theyre more likely to give something back.
And it never hurts to make a deal.
The worst way to approach someone is by threatening to take something away.
Its about giving not taking.
Show Them Youre on Their Side
Next, get yourself intheirmindset.
Whats their perspective on the matter?
Mirror their behavior so they dont feel uncomfortable, thenalign your projected attitude with theirs.
Say, for example, you have lunch plans with your friend.
You want to eat at Taco Bell for lunch, but you know youll need to convince them.
You: True, but its not the worst option either.
Them: We just ate fast food yesterday.
You: Yeah, youre right.
Not much else around here, though, you know?
Them: And I do like those Doritos tacos…
You: Theyre the best!
Come on, lets treat ourselves.
Never say theyre wrong or have a go at arguetheyll just get defensive and shut down.
Instead, latch on to the things they say that play into your favor.
Show them youre listening and willing to hear them out, while reaffirming the things you both agree on.
And,most important of all, have a real conversation with people before you ask them for anything.
If you might show how youre similar to them in some way, youre off to a great start.
Being persuasive doesnt mean you have to be pushy, so keep things classy.
