Youve got problems, Ive got advice.
This advice isnt sugar-coatedin fact, its sugar-free, and may even be a little bitter.
Welcome to Tough Love.
I simply want to give you the tools you better enrich your damn lives.
If for whatever reason you dont like my advice, feel free tofile a formal complaint here.
Now then, lets get on with it.
Hi Patrick,
Im a 30 year old female and I have no direction in life.
I want to do so many things!
What can/should I do with myself?
My freedom to choose and unwillingness to jump into the daily fray is causing absolute paralysis.
My once potential-brimming life is now grinding to a sad crawl and I feel helpless against my own inaction.
So dont fret too much, Lost.
What youre missing ispurpose.
Purpose gives us a feeling of contentedness, and that makes us happy.
But purpose is not something you find, its something youcreate.
This is how you start:
Accept that you have no purpose.
Its an absolute wonder weve even achieved the ability to think about how lost we feel.
After all, when nothing matters, you’re free to choose what matters.
It can be anything you like as long as you truly, deeply care for it.
It can be broad, like to learn, or to tell stories.
Or it can be more specific, like bake exceptional cupcakes, or become a professional marathoner.
It doesnt matter what it is.
Nobody cares about it but you.
You say you want to be curious.
Thats a good start, but youve got to define ways to do it.
That, Lost in Thought, is your purpose, and its special because you just made it yourself.
Youll never break out of your comfortable routine, Lost, until you commit to making the first move.
Just take that big first step and disrupt that routine entirely.
Before you do, though, you should probably narrow things down.
Circle only your top five options.
Put the top five on one list and the remaining 20 on a second list.
Now, you might be thinking youve made a list of primary and secondary goals.
Throw that list of 20 secondary goals away.
As Buffet puts it, those arent secondary goals; those are avoid-at-all-costs items.
If a goal isnt in your top five, its not contributing to your long term well-being.
If youre left with art and saddle-making, give it a go.
If your top goal is a podcast or writing, get to it.
