Like we can afford to go here and there, Joey complains.
What Is Financial Resentment?
Resentment takes over, making your goal progress feel insignificant and futile.
Neither option does much for your wallet or your mindset, for that matter.
As Birken points out, its not just about friendships, though.
It might also be resentment with a partner who outearns you.
Different incomesoften mean different money habits, and that can put strain on a relationship.
Resentment builds on both sides.
This kind of resentment is very common and has become a regular part of our political discourse.
Thankfully, Birken offers some advice.
Its kind of weird to forgive someone who might not havedoneanything to you, though.
Maybe youre just upset that your friend doesnt quite understand your own financial hardships.
Thats okaythe key is learning to see things from their perspective, a habit better known as empathy.
First, mentally switch places with the person you resent, Birken suggests.
Answering this forces you to think about the situation more objectively.
We often resent situations because we dont know the entire context.
Recognizing what you actually know and what you have made up can help you to release the resentment.
This brings up another interesting point: we oftenjudge other peoples spendingwithout understanding the full picture.
We jump to conclusions, which can also lead to resentment.
But Ramit, you might say, she went to Harvard.
Shes clearly a wasteful trust-fund baby whos living off mommy and daddys money.
But if thats your first thought, youre guilty of the
Shrug Effect
.
What is she doing that I dont know about?
Who can I talk to to learn more?
How can I earn more money?
In other words, not all resentment is unfounded.
Like other forms of abuse, financial abuse is ultimately about control.
In those cases
If this is the case, the issue really goes beyond resentment.
That is not something that it’s possible for you to fix with forgiveness, she says.
