If a no-good ex shoots you a text seemingly out of nowhere, it can feel scary or overwhelming.
Here are a few tips to get you through it.
That gives them more power, even if neither of you knows it.
Its always something like, Whats up?
or, Are you out?
sound like the brilliant wordplay of a conniving mega-mind to you?
Or like the no-effort shot-shooting of a clueless, horny man?
Dont make this more than what it is unless theres a reason.
I always wonder what he wants, said our Canadian woman, but I usually ignore him.
If I do respond, its to ask what possessed him to text me at that time.
Lets get into that.
Your answer could be anything.
You could insult them, you could be nice but distant, or you could ask to hang out.
Take time to think about what you want to say.
If they were bad to you, dont do it, no matter how much you hate sleeping alone.
Be careful, too, about responding with vitriol.
You also might not want screenshots of your screed circulating among your friend group.
Sometimes, closure is great.
Other times, a meet-up can just hurt you again.
Only you know if youre ready or willing to do that, so use your best judgement.
Ask clearly, What made you reach out and what are you hoping to get from this?
Im doing really well and hope you are too.
I dont think we need any additional discussion, but am I missing something?
You dont even have to reply right away.
If you want to, send a text that says something like, Hey.
I got your message and Im deciding how to respond.
I hope youre doing well.
Thanks for your patience.
you might and you should, if you feel thats right for you.
If this person was awful to you, block them when they text you.
Dont forget social media, too.
Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, Snapchat, LinkedInblock them across all of those.
No one has the right to intrude on your peace.
After a breakup, you work hard to rebuild your life and come out stronger on the other side.
Protect yourself, especially after this person has already shown that they wont.
