Two years ago I was pushed out of a writing job at a software company.
A couple weeks later I fired my therapist.
My job, it turns out, was causing the bulk of my mental health issues.
Life was suddenly just…good.
It has been ever since.
But here’s the thing: I agonized over leaving that job.
A culty tech company can make you forget this.
Many jokes are funny because they’re not true; this wasn’t one of those.
The company also spent a lot of timeand moneyblurring the line between co-workers and friendship.
And here’s the thing: I knew this.
I let a Slack instance and a paycheck become my world.
That’s what a culty tech company can do.
You might be working at such a company.
You may also, unlike me, not have the luxury of being able to leave.
Remember you are not alone
Culty tech companies thrive on the metaphorical Kool-Aid.
They depend on members buying the hype, or at the least pretending like they are.
That’s why public communicationsSlack, let’s say, or all-hands meetingsare always uniformly positive.
Everyone else is happy, after allwhy aren’t you?
You’re not crazy, though.
Doing this can be tricky.
I found it easiest during one-on-one conversationsmeetings, for example, or Slack DMs.
Start slow, making the occasional joke about how absurd the company is.
Be careful here.)
If you work in an actual office, that place might be a bar or coffee shop.
If you work remotely, I recommend using the encrypted messaging app Signal.
It’s not an easy way to make a living but I’ve always pulled it off.
I forgot that while working at a culty software company, though.
I’m still not sure what it is about that environment that made me doubt my self worth.
There’s something about the environment at a culty tech company that can make you feel worthless.
Part of this is that such companies tend to attract extremely qualified peopleyou might find yourself wanting by comparison.
So I’d encourage you to remember that you’re good at things.
Find ways to remind yourself of this.
Maybe ask your like-minded co-workers to let you know how you’re doing.
Maybe reach out to colleagues from past jobs.
You’re good at things.
Criticize leadership enough and you will eventually be askedor toldto shut up (believe me on this).
Improving and preserving the company culture is not your job.
And, if you really want to improve things for your co-workers,look into how unionization works.
I cannot overstate the extent to which none of that shit matters.
There is a whole world outside of work.
If you’re going to stay sane, you oughta be connected to it.
Go for a walk every day.
Join a softball league, or a church, or volunteer at a shelter.
Go to coffee shops, and bars, and concerts.
take a stab at learn a musical instrument.
Host a monthly party, inviting people from different parts of your life to meet each other.
It’s going to be hard to feel like a person if you don’t.
And that’s what you are: a person.
Not an employee, and not a part of a company.
You are on this planet for a limited amount of time.
By some miracle or coincidence, you are capable of not only thought, but also feeling.
Don’t waste all of that on a company that will never love you back.
