You might be a little (or a lot) controlling.
guilty of trying to control the shit out of everything you can.
You dont like when anyone else is in charge (naturallythey are too slow and doing it wrong).
Someone does the laundry or loads the dishwasher wrong?
How to tell if youre a control freak
Chances are, you already know.
Youre a perfectionist with high standards (and you dont trust anyone else to meet them).
You over-plan and get upset when things dont go the way you envisioned them.
Theres only one right way to do somethingwhich happens to be yours.
You get angry when other people mess up your plan, or do things differently than you would.
You prefer to be in charge.
That way, there will be fewer mistakes.
You have trouble giving others free rein to do things as they see fit.
Instead, you micromanage.
Youre overly-critical of yourself and others.
The catch is,we actually cant really control other people or situationsor do anything perfectly.
Striving for control [doesnt] ultimately make us feel better, Martin said.
doesnt exactly lead to household harmony.
Not only does controlling behavior contribute to emotional and physical stress, it can damage your important relationships.
Challenge the fear.Ask yourself: What will happen if I dont control this situation?
Recognize that you may be catastrophizing or worrying about the worst possible outcome, which may be quite unlikely.
If they are effective, and arent deleterious to your relationships, OK. You may want to continue.
If not, thats your cue to stop.
Realize perfectionism slows you down.
Yes, everything you write may be free from typos, but how many times did you review it?
(Its usually at least six for me.)
How long did you obsess over the word choice?
Trying to get everything perfect is time-consuming and it limits your growth and learning experiences.
Investigate the root cause.Do you know what led you to be so controlling?
If not, engage in some self-reflective work to learn why.
Are the fears and conditions that drove you to learn the behavior still occurring?
(Often, theyre long in the past, but the habit persists.)
Realize youre not actually right all the time.
Its time to let go of (some of) your ego.
Yes, youre great at what you do.
Your systems and attention to detail are top-notch.
Andwe know this is a tough pill to swallow, butthe way other people do things is also valid.
(And sometimes, lets face it, their methodsarebetter.)
Notice the cost.When has your need for control caused you to lose something of value?
(Be honest.)
Accept you cant control everything (and choose a mantra).
Acknowledge and accept there are things outside of your control (including people).
My way isnt the only way.
I will respect other peoples choices.
Maybe someone else chooses the restaurant, shops for and makes dinner, or plans your next family excursion.
Practice with small things first and work your way up to larger ones.
