The first and main rule is: Do no more harm.
Science doesnt work that way.
These people have actual doctors and treatment plans for a reason.
Someone else always has it worse, no matter how bad you have it.
Pain, grief and loss are not a competition.
Knowing someone else struggled harder or longer does not make a decent person feel better.
you’re able to validate without minimizing.
Adoption is an expensive, lengthy process that simply isnt feasiblefinancially, emotionally or logisticallyfor everyone.
It is one path to parenthood but it is not an automatic replacement option for having a biological child.
Do not suggest it.
Theyve probably researched it, tried it or dismissed it as irrelevant for them.
Remember that theyre living this, and they know more about their body than you do.
Then follow their lead.
Okay, so now you feel like you cant say or do anything, right?
it’s possible for you to say and do things in a thoughtful way.
Everyone is different; some people like to be checked on regularly and others find it overwhelming.
Meet them where they are
This is not the time to play devils advocate.
If theyre sad, be sad with them.
If theyre hopeful, be hopeful.
If theyre mad, you are, too.
because it may not and to claim it will isnt helpful.
On the morning of the appointment, send a text to let her know youre thinking of her.
Let them take reins on how much theyd like to be involved.
Yes, pregnancy is hard!
Remember that theyd give anything for swollen ankles and sleepless nights.
Your struggle is real, but its important to know your audience when you oughta vent about it.
Remember that the process is likely also taking an emotional toll on her partner.
Let them know that youre here for them, too, if they ever need to talk.
Dont remind them thatat leastthey have one child they can be grateful forthey know that and they are.
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