It can feel like an obligation to make nice and become close with your significant others friends.
You might not be crazy about some of the people in your partners social orbit.
People can be understandably protective of their friends.
To that end, show them that youre supportive of your partner.Dr.
you’ve got the option to set the tone by showing up and making an effort.
You dont want to look like youre performing.
Rather, show a passion for the things your partner is passionate about.
Demonstrate a commitment to enriching their lives by being supportive of the things they love.
If your dedication and commitment is evident enough, its likely that any skepticism will fade away.
Dont try too hard
You have to be yourself.
But if its just a routine skepticism, dont gotoofar out of your way to curry good favor.
It becomes transparent pretty quickly when you make overt attempts to get someone to like you.
To that end, Sherman recommends putting your ego aside.
Let things flow naturally.
Be direct
If someone is dismissive of you, it can be tempting to return the favor.
But you’re free to garner a lot of good faith by killing this person with kindness.
Ask them how they are.
Make eye contact and smile.
Remember if they mentioned something important the last time you saw them, and then follow up on it.
If you do that, the rest can and should fall into place.
And if it doesnt, its likely that its your partners friend who should reevaluate their approach.
Understand the limits
Sherman notes that some attempts to reconcile with a skeptical friend come with limits.
Perhaps this friend just has an axe to grind that seems intractable.
In that case, its fine to let your partner have their relationship with this person without you.
Of course, you could always be civil with this person.
