One of the great things about strap-ons is that anyone can use them.
If you have a penis, you’re able to use a strap-on.
If you dont have a penis, you’ve got the option to use a strap-on.
If youre interested in trying it out, heres your beginners guide.
Learn the Basics
Strap-ons are obviously meant to mimic the look and experience of having a penis.
The basic strap-on setup is comprised of a harness and a dildo.
The dildo has a flared base; the harness typically has an O-ring that the dildo gets threaded through.
The combination of the flared base and the O-ring hold the dildo in place against the wearers pelvis.
Harnesses typically come in one of three styles:
Jockstrap.
This version looks like a classic jockstrap, with straps around the waist and over each butt cheek.
This version typically looks like a pair of underwear or boxers.
you’re able to use them for wearing a dildo all day, or during sex.
It takes some time and patience, but the payoff can make it all worth it.
If you have a nice sex shop in your area, I highly,highlyrecommend shopping in person.
A knowledgeable sales person can walk you through the entire process.
Many stores even have strap-on workshops.
Being able to look at and touch your harness and dildo makes a huge difference in the buying process.
If you have to shop online, read as many reviews as you’ve got the option to.
Reviews can provide surprisingly detailed and informative information about your options.
The harness should be pretty snug, to ensure you have maximum control over your dildo.
Adjustable straps will help you get the fit just right.
double-check you understand which model youre buying.
you could get a harness with a bullet vibrator attachment, which delivers vibrations against your clitoris.
verify your toy is made from body-safe material, typically silicone.
A lot of sex toys are made out of porous materials that can release chemical compounds called pthalates.
it’s possible for you to read more about thishere.
If it doesnt explicitly say body-safe, dont get it.
(This is often referred to as packing.)
These types of dildos are meant to resemble non-erect penises.
Getting Used to Your Gear
Wearing a harness and dildo feels weird at first.
Its a whole extra appendage that you may have never had before.
It takes some time to bond with your new body part.
I recommend wearing your harness and dildo alone for a while.
Wear them around the house as you do non-sexual activities.
Wash the dishes with your dildo on.
Watch TV with your dildo on.
I also highly suggest masturbating with the strap-on on.
Here, again, I recommend going slow.
Let your partner see you in your new purchases.
Wear your harness and dildo as you and your partner make out.
check that your partner knows to tell you anytime they need you to stop and apply more lube.
Remember: never use like with like when it comes to lube.
If your dildo is silicone-based, you wont be able to use silicone lube with it.
You may not ever have had to use thrusting motions during intercourse before.
If thats the case for you, thrusting is going to feel supremely weird at first!
You just dont have the muscles that thrusting develops.
If you have a male partner, ask him for a thrusting lesson.
Or you may want to try missionary, where you might focus more on grinding against your partner.
Communication is always key when it comes to sex, and strap-on sex is no different.
Ask your partner to give you a lot of feedback about what feels good to them.
Go nice and slow until you both get the hang of it.
Aftercare
Sometimes strap-on sex can be an emotional experience, for both partners.
It may feel really vulnerable to wear a strap-on for the first time.
It may feel really vulnerable to have intercourse with a strap-on for the first time.
If anything does come up for you, let it come up.
Keep checking in with each other throughout, and talk about it afterwards.
