Here are some common first date snafus, and how to recover when they happen to you.
When youre running behind despite your best efforts, not all is lost.
Theres still something you’re able to do to stay in your dates good graces.
Again, not when yourealreadylate, as soon as you realize the inevitability of being late.
Marin also recommends you apologize again once you arrive:
Apologize once you get there as well.
Say something like, I really owe you one for being late today.
Would you let me make it up to you by taking you on a killer second date?
Dating columnist andKotaku contributorDr.
Nerdlovesuggests you dig a little deeper if you get that second chance.
), just cancel and reschedule.
Courtesy goes a long way here.
Either way, get this figured out as quickly as possible, says Marin.
If you’ve got the option to get some clarification before you meet, do so.
If not, dont let too much time pass before you ask once you meet up.
Be prepared for their answer to go either way.
If they say yes, great.
If they say no, at least you know the pressures off.
Youre better off talking about it like an adult.
Youretrying to get to know each other, and you cant do that if you dont talk.
Why…
Whats the best part of…
Have you… /Did you…
When they answer your questions,practice active listening and wait for your turn to speak.
It doesnt hurt to rephrase what they said to check that you understand.
That example is a little on the cheesy side, but you get the idea.
Dont overdo it or make yourself sound creepy.
If the opposite is happening, and you cant seem to shut up, its okay.
Im way more interested in learning about you.
Then you’ve got the option to segue into a question.
A laugh or smile will help ease the tension, then ask them something about themselves.
Its okay, its bound to happen, especially when meeting people for the first time.
Just realize that everybody and their dog knows about the emergency call trick.
Its less insulting to say Hey, its been nice meeting you, but Ive got to go.
It feels more like a friendship jot down of connection between us.
Thanks for spending time with me tonight.
Furthermore, both Marin and Nerdlove agree that you should be totally honest about further plans.
Dont say Ill call you or We should do this again sometime just to keep things from being awkward.
Forcing things doesnt work out for anyone.
Even a decent venue can throw you a curveball, however.
This happens more often than you think, says Nerdlove, so always have a contingency plan ready.
Make up stories about the other people around you, or joke about the bizarre atmosphere.
A bad experience can also be a chance to secure a second date.
What do you do?
For starters, Marin says you should apologize profusely, and mean it.
Whether you were planning on paying for everything or not, youve now forced it all on them.
Explain that it was an accident and venture to find a way to make it up to them.
Basically, you want a dating utility belt so youre always ready for anything.
Odds are you spent a lot of time with them, so you have shareable stories that involve them.
Even so, talking about your ex is a quick way to end a date.
In fact, itsone of the biggest red flagspeople look out for on a date.
Marin recommends you turn it into a compliment before changing the subject.
Say something like Im sorry, I shouldnt be talking about my ex on a first date.
Youre such a good listener!
Im apparently comfortable talking to you about anything.
Then you’re able to ask them a question or shift topics.
Dont panic, says Marin.
Just keep it simple, say that youre sorry, and let them explain if they want to.
They may have a no-kissing-on-the-first-date policy, or maybe the timing just wasnt right.
Dont take it personally and dont make a big deal out of it.
Dont dont pull back or make a production out of it.
The more attention you bring to the mistake, the bigger a deal it will become.
So when should you go for the kiss?
It depends on the date and how well things are going.
Theyll also be looking at your mouth.
Be sure to move in slowly, however.
Can I take another crack?
Illustration by Sam Woolley.
