In 2010, Taylor got a phone call that would, at least temporarily, blow up her life.
Her friend, who happened to be dating her ex-boss, called to let her know.
I had a full-blown panic attack on the phone as soon as she called me.
He laughed at me, she says.
I started to cry on the phone.
I had a full blown panic attack on the phone as soon as she called me.
But the damage had been done.
At the time there werent any laws on the books about revenge porn, she says.
I didnt know if I could go to the police.
I was worried they would blame me for having taken the photo.
Taylor felt alone, but she wasnt.
Despite its prevalence, the laws governing revenge porn are murky, and vary from state to state.
Here are some things you’ve got the option to do if it happens to you.
You do feel like your world is crashing down before your eyes.
But its something you are able to get past.
There is more support available now than there ever has been.
Gather your resources
One such means of support is the aforementionedCyber Civil Rights Initiative.
The groupsSomething Can Be Done!
We can be your friends, and allies and advocates.
Its amazing to see these women blossom after just a little bit of support.
Collect evidence
The first section in Without My Consents Something Can Be Done!
guide involves compiling and preserving evidence.
Make copies of everything.
Theres even a handysample checklistyou can download as a Word doc.
Once youve cobbled the evidence together, Johnstone recommends putting it in one binder.
The evidence chart makes your first interaction with the people who can help you really positive.
I object to this.
The good news is, this is much easier to do now than it used to be.
This is especially true for big social media platforms likeFacebookand Instagram.
Twitter also took the photos down, though they didnt disable his account.
Thats an example of how different sites handle them differently.
If youre dealing with one of those sites, your best bet is to go through copyright laws.
This is where the Digital Millennium Copyright Act, or DMCA, comes in handy.
If youre a victim and its a selfie, then you own the copyright.
Typically the person who takes the picture owns the copyright.
Another option is to drop a line to the person you believe uploaded the video.
I object to this.
I demand that you immediately take it down and never do it again, says Bloom.
That might scare them enough to get your photos down.
But before that…
We are still not in a place where law enforcement treats people with dignity.
Should I go to the police?
I think that would ramp it up and get them to take it down, Bloom says.
The more evidence you have in your binder, after all, the stronger your case.
And its not funny, girls kill themselves over this.
In fact, in some instances, police can make things even worse.
You show them pictures and theyre showing them around to buddies in the office, Frank says.
We are still not in a place where law enforcement treats people with dignity.
Which brings us to…
Hiring an attorney
Heres some bad news.
Few states have strong (or any) such laws.
Outside of California, though, it can be difficult to figure out which route to take.
When you get an attorney involved were a little more nuanced in how we deal with the court.
A good lawyer can be hugely helpful in these cases, Johnstone says.
CCRI also has aliston their website of attorneys who will similarly take on pro bono revenge porn clients.
If you choose to meet with an attorney, be sure to bring your evidence binder with you.
BADASS army founder Bowden struggled after her photos went viral.
I was paranoid and humiliated, Bowden says.
I didnt want to go out in public.
But make a run at remind yourself that none of this is as insurmountable as it seems.
Just remember that these sites are niche platforms.
Not everybody has seen [your images], Bowden says.
At some point this is just another really bad part of your life that youll look back on.
What is it, its a naked image of you?
Okay, you have a body under your clothes.
Everybody does, Bloom says.
Its just a sex tape.
Normal adult human beings have sex, its nothing to be ashamed of.
Hes the person who should be ashamed of what hes done.
Were all very conscious of our own stuff.
Were not that conscious of other peoples stuff.
People are not really all looking at images of you, she says.
This is going to be a blip.
This is going to recede into the rearview mirror of your life.
One coping skill is to do whatever we can to prevent this from happening to other people.
Thats the only justice theyre going to see.
This crime hinges on a culture that doesnt prioritize consent, that prioritizes sexual shame.
We know what the ingredients are.
In fact, the #MeToo movement has been helpful in amplifying the conversation around revenge porn.
This crime hinges on a culture that doesnt prioritize consent, that prioritizes sexual shame, Taylor says.
People dont seem to understand sexual consent, Franks says.
She let me take a photo of her, so I can put it on your website.
