When you start having mental health problems, no one tells you they might take years to resolve.
That I had failed.
This year, I especially struggled with depression.
I was haunted by the treatment I had received at a toxic company.
Money played a role too, as Ive been financially supporting my sick mom for years.
In times like those, the weight on my shoulders felt unbearable.
I was just relieved to be getting help.
Most importantly, on that day I realized that we are all a product of our life stories.
Ive even had moments where I havent wanted to live.
Theyre just not themainstory.
This understanding, which is perhaps obvious to some, has made all the difference for me.
I was almost one of them.
Over the years, Ive put off getting help many times.
Over the years, Ive put off getting help many times.
Ive also isolated myself during periods where I was depressed because I didnt want to burden or scare anyone.
In the end, though, the person I was hurting most was myself.
Today, I regularly count on my psychologist, psychiatrist, and family doctor.
Its one of the best things Ive done.
Even though its hard and frustrating, dont give up on finding them.
It took me years to find a good psychologist.
I happened to find her in the historic Spanish city of Segovia when I studied abroad.
Yet, the choice to receive medical treatment for mental health problems is often difficult to make.
But it shouldnt be.
I realized that I needed help, and I didnt care what anyone else thought about it.
Recently, though, Ive started to incorporate these words into my daily vocabulary.
Last month, I started working out with a new personal trainer at the gym.
He appreciated my honesty.
And if shes struggling, maybe hell be able to encourage her to find the help she needs.
If something didnt go the way I planned it, I would start to break down.
Its taken me almost 10 years to get to a good place with my mental health.
Ive felt like throwing in the towel many times, but Im so glad that I didnt.
It gave me the impression that if I wasnt doing great and amazing things, I was a loser.
When I wasnt thinking about that, I was worried about being bullied.
Meanwhile, on Instagram everything was perfect.
Everyone was living a perfect life, even during a pandemic.
The feeling stayed with me through high school, college, and into the work force.
We dont live to work.
Its taken me almost 10 years to get to a good place with my mental health.
Ive felt like throwing in the towel many times, but Im so glad that I didnt.
Of course, it doesnt mean Im cured, or that I wont struggle.
But it means that Ill keep fighting, learning, and living.
I hope you will, too.
