But what if that vulnerability makes you so anxious you find it hard to function?
The key is learning to embrace vulnerability without allowing it to take over.
I opened myself up to criticism, judgment, and mockery.
I poured over every comment, analyzed it, and took it way too personally, good or bad.
Think about your deepest relationshipwhether its your spouse, a good friend, your parents, or a sibling.
Chances are, youve shared some vulnerable moments with this person.
For the first time in almost ten years, I recently got into a fight with a friend.
It wasnt pretty, but it strengthened our friendship.
We went fromokayfriends to really good, ride-or-die buddies for life.
Either way, vulnerability isnt just part of a meaningful relationship, its crucial to one.
Vulnerability also challenges yourconfirmation bias.
It can be uncomfortable to ask questions, express your opinion, or talk about your emotions with people.
A little stress and anxiety are a normal part of leaving your comfort zone.
Breaking out of your comfort zone makes you feel vulnerable, but that feeling works in your favor.
It improves your performance, according toYerkes-Dodson Law.
So when you feel anxious, exposed, and vulnerable, youre growing.
If vulnerability sends your stress into overdrive, your goal is to find your optimal anxiety.
Blatant honesty comes easy for some people, but I have ahard time with it.
So I made it my goal to be brutally honest with someone at least once a month.
Of course, after I said it, I realized it wasnt a big deal.
I build these things up in my head andthatcauses more anxiety than anything.
I was focused on crossing that goal off my list, which motivated me to tell her the truth.
Without a goal, I probably wouldve told her a white lie without giving it any additional thought.
Were afraid of how people will react to the truth.
I looked at the situation from the perspective of getting something done, which took off the pressure.
Setting a goal can help you get past that anticipation and feel in control of your vulnerability.
I also fed off of her confidence and charisma and didnt take the event so seriously.
You probably have friends who are pros at embracing vulnerability, too.
They constantly put themselves out there, try new things, and live for adventure.
Maybe its a networking thing, or stand-up comedy, or surf lessons.
Practice Mindfulness
I hate interviews.
I worry Ill say something stupid, ask dumb questions, or bomb in general.
I constantly think about the interview for weeks leading up to it until its finally over.
Reminders: I set reminders to focus on different activities.
For example, I use thetomato-timerapp while I work to focus on 20 minutes at a time.
The app reminds me to take a break, then it reminds me to refocus on my work.
I do the same thing with dinner.
Journaling: For me, journaling serves as adaily check-in.
I can release my anxieties so they dont sneak into every other activity throughout the day.
I get them out of my head and on paper, where I sort them out.
And then I can focus on the task at hand.
When I feel anxious, Im scared of whatmighthappen, anticipating some future event.
Finally, keep the momentum going.
When you get used to breaking out of your comfort zone, the whole process becomes less scary.
Illustration by: Angelica Alzona.
Photos by:Pham Khoai,unsplash,unsplash
